Baking a Baby - 18 Weeks

Photo courtesy of Keira :-)

Finally! I've been trying to blog since last Friday, which was my actual 18 week milestone.

So, we have our big-check-on-baby, find-out-what-we're-having ultrasound tomorrow, and I really wanted to do one pregnancy update before then. Even though it probably makes more sense to do one tomorrow and leave it at that, I decided to go ahead and cater to my whims and do one blog post today regardless.

The mid-pregnancy ultrasound is a scary thing for me. I don't usually talk about being diabetic because it's a very private thing. But, it's part of my every thought these days, so it might sneak into blog posts here and there. Being diabetic means that for the past 4 months I've heard in constant doctor appointments nothing but how I am likely to have a baby that has virtually has no chance of being healthy. In (of course) the most condescending and judgmental of tones. We know this better than anyone, and I've thought of nothing else and prayed over it constantly for the past 4 months.  Obviously, God is in control, and he has the child that we need coming to us. That being said, it's hard to face this appointment with that in my head--after a while it just builds up and no matter how hard I try to keep the voice of sanity in my head, thinking about it and dealing with it constantly builds up to this sort of deep dread. We have two healthy children for which we are SO very thankful, and this one could obviously be healthy as well... and I've been working SO hard at making sure I do everything to that end. While most of me is excited for the ultrasound and to see our little one, I just can't help dreading the appointment anyway.

I have no intention of doing a pregnancy update every week, but I thought it would be fun to at least a few throughout. So, here goes:

Size of Baby: Uh, I'll let you know tomorrow?! I'm guessing small. I tend to have small skinny babies, (which is really good considering most diabetics have huge babies for unhealthy reasons, and even though I feel huge, realistically I think I'm still pretty small, all in all. If that makes any sense. So, I'm thinking small. I'm looking forward to finding out though.

Total Weight Gain: Maybe only about 5 pounds? But I started out higher than I should have, bad me, so I'm deliberately doing my best to just make really healthy food choices and maintain until just a bit later in the pregnancy when the baby will be gaining, and will need me to gain. So far, so good.

Maternity Clothes: I had to buy jeans. Um, yeah. They are like the most comfortable, cutest jeans EVER. I may wear them even after I'm done. I bought one maternity shirt and another one that I think will actually last almost all the way through the pregnancy, if not all, and I've got a lot of shirts that I've made that are long enough to at least last through the spring. I really don't want to buy too many clothes. I am currently having the hardest time with skirts and dresses. Formulating a plan for that... :-)

Movement: Yes, here and there. It's been a little nerve-wracking actually, because at this point with both Keira and Brie I could feel them ALL. DAY. LONG. But, I was sitting at a desk, and they would hit the edge of the desk all day, to the point where I just felt raw where my skin would be sandwiched between them and the desk constantly. And, I was more focused on them... obviously--if you've got the minutiae of mortgage paperwork in front of you that you could deal with with your eyes closed, and a wonderful baby beating the insides of you, you're going to focus on the baby. With this one I feel it when I sit still or lay down. I've also felt it just a bit higher than I should, so I think I'm carrying long ways up and down. And, I get kicked and hit in the back here and there, with a little turtle hump back rolling over the front of my stomach. So, I think it's spending a lot of time facing backwards these days. I'm hoping this sort of casual rolling around, non-punching motion that seems to go on a lot is a sign of a placid, easy-going child. HA!

Sleep: In my first trimester I had equal parts insomnia and heartburn and low blood sugars that would keep me up all night. I still spend a fair amount of time in an unfortunate state of wakefulness. Definitely not too physically uncomfortable yet though. Just in the past week I've noticed that I can't lay on my back for more than a few minutes. I'm calling that pregnancy progress. :-)


What I Miss: Trying new microbrews. We just found a grocery store that has a bajillion of them. Plus our first batch is edible now. Cruel and Unusual. I also really miss Keira and Brianna snuggled up tight against me. It's hard to fit two big kids with sharp elbows and knees and hips and heads, (yes, Brianna has a very sharp round head) and one belly on your lap. I also miss wearing all my favorite clothes.


Cravings: Not too bad so far. Here and there for chocolate, or a cheeseburger or something. Nothing that really stands out too much or is any weirder than un-pregnant me. I'm the not-pregnant-woman who will make Fettuccine Alfredo at 11pm because I've got a horrible craving for it out of nowhere, so I've never had weird cravings be a huge part of any of my pregnancies because that's just how I am normally, haha.


Symptoms: All of them. The usual gamut. Dropping stuff. Achy back. Large stomach. Ya know. The one weird one I've had this pregnancy that I didn't have with the other two is heartburn, right from the start. With my first two I'd only get heartburn closer to the end of the pregnancy if I ate a whole rack of ribs, not that I ever did that, or when I was on bed rest with Keira. Mostly just sitting up keeps it at bay though, so it's been somewhat manageable.


What I am looking forward to: Finding out what kind of person we have baking here!! I am SO SO SO tired of hearing (really only a few) people say things like, "I hope you have a boy!" To be fair, I'd still feel this way if they said they hoped we had a girl too... it's just beyond rude and thoughtless. Ok, rant ahead. Sorry. Can't seem to help myself.


First of all, every child's sex is determined long before any person, involved or not in it's creation know what's happening. Secondly, anyone's hopes in that regard are completely immaterial to reality. Because the Bible makes it really exceedingly clear in many places that He knows us and has plans for each of His children long before time even began.


Psalm 139:13-18... For you formed my inward parts, You covered me in my mother's womb. I will praise you for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Marvelous are your works, and that my soul knows very well. My frame was not hidden from you, when I was made in secret, and skillfully wrought in the lowest parts of the earth. Your eyes saw my substance, being yet unformed, and in Your book they all were written, The days fashioned for me, when as yet there were none of them. How precious also are Your thoughts to me, O God! How great is the sum of them! If I should count them, they would be more in number than the sand; when I awake, I am still with you. 


and Jeremiah 1:5...Before I formed you in the womb I knew you; before you were born I sanctified you.


and Ephesians 1:4... He chose us in Him before the foundation of the world...


So, from this I draw that God already has an amazing person picked out for the third child in our family. And, He alone knew long before the days were fashioned for us what the four of us would need in that third child, and who they would be, and what that child needs from us. We will be thrilled if it's a girl or we will be thrilled if it's a boy, because that is exactly what God means for us to have. Also, I might just add that being that I am **slightly** hormonal right now, (I should probably add that to the symptoms, huh?! Nah...) when a person says, "I hope you have a girl/boy." what I hear is "I'm going to be disappointed if you have something other than what I hope you have." Which makes my super-sharp-overprotective-rip-your-eyeballs-out-mommy-claws come out, BIG TIME. It should be duly noted that I haven't actually ripped anyone's eyeballs out yet.


Ok, I'm done now. Thanks for listening. I'm also super excited to pick out a name. Second to meeting the new little person and all that, naming them is pretty much one of my favorite parts. :-)


Milestones: Checking weeks off my calendar. I LOVE checking weeks off. As long as some days feel, this pregnancy is FLYING by. I can't believe we're almost to the halfway mark already!!


Best Moment This Week: Watching the kids excitement grow... they are SO thrilled. This huge, unconditional love they have for this baby already is just the sweetest thing.


Ok, that'll do for a pregnancy update!