Kidbits...

Yes, I know I am doing one of these posts right on the tippy tail of another one... but my kids have just been full of it lately, so you, my dear reader, get the goods.

It's 20 degrees outside, and I as usual, forgot a jacket when running errands. Kiki is taking her sweet time getting out of the car. I'm shivering, and I tell her, very impatiently, to hurry up. Indignantly, she announces, "I am VERY allergic to mother's with bad attitudes."

We're driving home, and Kiki is sucking on a gumball.

Kiki: "I wonder if Mr. Wonka was right?"

Me: "What do you mean?"

Kiki: "Well, remember how he said if you bit that candy your little teeth would break right off? I fink this might be that candy."

I had Kiki test some strawberry jam I made a few weeks ago... "Yum!" she said, "this tastes like LOVE!" (momma's heart goes AAaaaaawwww!)

I don't know why I ask her this question, as she usually comes up with something totally off the wall to respond with. Case in point...
Me: Debris, what do you want for breakfast?

Debris: "SKIN OF TIGER!"

Kiki (very mournfully): "I feel so bad for you Momma."

Me: "Why?"

Kiki: "Cause you just work SO hard around here!!"

Debris: "Momma, how do hoomans die?"

I launch into a long explanation about old age, violence, illness, accidents, etc., of course peppering my lecture with examples, and admonishing her that obedience to her parents and God can make death by some of these things less likely. Meanwhile, she's just sitting there listening patiently. When I'm done, she flashes me a grin, and says, "That's not right! Hoomans die because their hearts stop beeping!"

Before I tell this next one, I would just like to preface it by saying that while I speak to the girls about covering themselves, being modest, and so on, I have NEVER in my memory, pointed out, or indicated any kind of disgust for others in "immodest" clothing. I figure teaching them personal responsibility should come first, and as they get older, and notice these things in other people, we can discuss it then. They are, in my humble opinion, too young to be told things that might make them come across as judgemental, and therefore un-christian, to others--self-righteously snotty children are a pet peeve of mine. So anyway, this observation came as a surprise (not an unpleasant one, though!) to me.

Kiki was trying on a dress I was in the process of making for her. "Mom," she says, "you gotta put a zipper in this dress so I don't go walking around with my back showing like a shamer!"

A before-bed conversation with Kiki:

Kiki: "But Daddy, I miss you when I go to bed!"

Daddy: "That's okay. You're sleeping, so you don't know you're missing me!"

Kiki: "But Daddy, I miss my awake self when I'm sleeping!"

Kiki screams bloody murder from the next room. Debris comes barreling out of the room at top speed. "Momma!! Kiki was not being NORMAL! I had to hit her because she NEEDS TO BE NORMAL!!! She was acting crazy, so I got in her face! She NEEDS TO BE NORMAL!"

We have been reading through Exodus in the mornings... we got to the plague where the water in the land of Egypt turns to blood. I was trying to impress upon the girls how horrible this would be, so after going over the many uses clean of water, I added, "Can you imagine if we were driving over the Columbia River, and it was all blood?! Wouldn't that be gross?" Kiki says, "Have you seen any blood lately mom? It is a gorgeous red color. I fink it would be LOVELY if all the rivers were red." Okay, then.

Every morning I've been giving them questions to try to help them retain what we read that day, and previous days. It's really working... their answers are getting smarter and more detailed daily. Kiki feels it necessary to question me in response. Using the same tone and cadence that I use, she asks me questions after I ask them questions... here are just a few of the odd/good/complicated ones. I'll admit, at first some of them made me feel uncomfortable, but I decided to just go with it, and discuss/answer each question, and we've had some really neat conversations and observations as a result.

"Does God eat?"

"Does God sleep?"

"Does Jesus have Jesus in His heart?"

Me: "Girls, what are blessings?"

Debris: "Snakes!"

Kiki, very matter of factly: "Snakes are not blessings, Brianna. They are poisonous reptiles."

(I took this opportunity to point out when a snake actually could be a blessing... like I would consider a Bull Snake a blessing if I was being attacked by a Rattle Snake... Or, if my house were surrounded by rats, GOD FORBID, I wouldn't mind a snake or two to momentarily clean that mess up before I took a shovel to it, screaming all the while, etc., this really got them going... we had a Bull Snake crushed on our street last fall, but Rattle Snakes can be a real threat around here, so I try to always keep that in mind when wandering around.)

And, finally, a few sentences that have flown out of my mouth lately...

"You don't wipe your mouth on your underwear!!" (yes, she was wearing them at the time!)

"You don't put Dolly's hair in the nachos!!"

Last week I walked into the kitchen to this lovely mess...

Debris LOVES peanut butter! (I bought this 6 months ago, and ate a spoonful before I fed it to them, just to make sure it's safe. :-))

Kiki has taken up golfing as her sport of choice these days. Last night she was practicing. And, I found them with the golf channel on this morning, discussing the swing of the guy who was playing. I have no idea how they managed that one in the 10 minutes they were alone while I was in the shower.

And, Saturday night, they split one of these thick steaks between the two of them... Amazing! I love it when they eat! Is that just me, or are all mom's like that? I feel like every bite I get down their skinny selves is a struggle. BTW, that was our delicious Valentine's day dinner--lovingly grilled steak, despite snow, via Frank Castle. Yum! Crusty on the outside, rare on the inside. What a treat! Thanks sweetie!And, I cut up one of our enormous apples from my previous post, and had to show a picture of it taking up a whole dinner plate. That is ONE APPLE! Amazing!

Have a great day!